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第17部分（第2页）

She　drained　the　rest　of　her　drink　and　spontaneously　threw　her　arms　around　his　back。　“Happy　New　Year；　Natie！”　she　yelled　into　his　shoulder　blades　as　if　it　were　the　old　days；　and　she’d　just　seen　him　a　couple　hours　ago；　rather　than　a　whole　year。　His　body　felt　stronger　than　she’d　remembered；　and　she　could　feel　his　taut　muscles　through　his　shirt。

“Serena；”　Nate　said　dumbly；　turning　so　his　face　was　inches　from　hers。　He　could　smell　her　familiar　patchouli…infused　essential　oil　scent；　and　at　first　he　wondered　if　this　was　some　very　weird　reaction　to　the　pot　he’d　smoked　earlier。　Somebody　at　the　party　had　had　a　bag　of　incredible　Thai　stick　and　had　generously　shared　it　with　him。

“How　are　you？”　he　finally　asked。　It　was　a　dumb　and　obvious　question　and　not　at　all　what　he　wanted　to　say。　He　wanted　to　tell　her　he　was　sorry；　that　he　still　loved　her；　that　Chips　had　died　and　he　was　high　and　didn’t　even　know　what　to　do　about　it。　He　wanted　to　hold　her　and　never　let　go。

Serena　shrugged　and　smiled。　Her　navy　blue　eyes　looked　far　away。　“I’m　okay。　How　are　you？”

“I’m…　okay；”　he　said；　shifting　from　one　Stan　Smith　sneaker　to　the　other。　Talk　about　the　understatement　of　the　year。　He　wasn’t；　not　at　all。　He　was　a　fucking　mess。　But　right　now；　with　Serena　near　him；　he　felt　better　than　he　had　in　a　long　time。

“Nathaniel　fucking　Archibald！”

Nate　whirled　around。　Towering　above　him　was　a　guy　with　a　familiar　shock　of　reddish…blond　hair。　It　was　Jeremy　Scott　Tompkinson；　one　of　his　old　St。　Jude’s　classmates。　Jeremy　had　always　been　excessively　skinny　and　only　about　five　foot　two；　but　he’d　obviously　had　a　late…adolescent　growth　spurt　in　college。　He　was　huge；　massive！　Jeremy　was　trailed　by　Charlie　Dern　and　Anthony　Avuldsen；　who　were　wearing　matching　Hamilton　College　visors　perched　on　the　sides　of　their　heads　to　plement　their　matching　beer　guts。

Nate　held　out　a　hand　and　Jeremy；　Charlie；　and　Anthony　all　slapped　it　in　turn；　their　customary　salute。　Charlie’s　eyes　bugged　beneath　his　floppy　bangs　as　he　took　in　his　old　friend。　“I　thought　you　were　in；　like；　the　army。”

Close　enough。

“Nah；　I　was　in　school；”　Nate　said。　While　he　was　excited　to　see　his　old　St。　Jude’s　buddies；　he　didn’t　really　feel　like　playing　catch…up。　How　could　he　explain　about　sailing　the　world；　about　Chips；　about　what　he　was　up　to　now？　They　probably　had　no　clue　what　Deep　Springs　was　or　what　it　was　really　about。　But　he　knew　Serena　would　get　it。　He　suddenly　wanted　to　be　with　Serena；　alone。

“Where　have　you　guys　been？　Beer　Pong　State？”　Serena　easily　teased　the　guys。

Nate　cracked　a　grin；　glad　that　Serena　was　acting　so　chill。　She　hadn’t　grabbed　his　wrist；　dragged　him　to　a　corner；　and　yelled　at　him　for　being　an　asshole。　That　was　nice。

Nate　realized　that　everyone　was　looking　at　him　curiously　and　snapped　out　of　his　reverie。　“I　know　how　to　milk　a　cow；”　he　said　randomly。

Congratulations。

“Man；　really？”　Jeremy　asked；　his　eyes　wide。　“So；　like；　you　just　squeeze？”

“Well；　sort　of。”　Nate　thought　back　to　Juliet；　his　favorite　cow　in　the　barn。　He’d　sometimes　find　himself　whispering　to　her；　telling　her　stories　about　the　day　or　asking　her　questions。　He’d　always　feel　reassured　when　she’d　moo　back；　as　if　she　understood　what　he　meant。　In　a　way；　it　was　the　same　way　he　felt　when　he　was　with　Serena。　Not　like　Serena　reminded　him　of　a　cow；　but　he　didn’t　feel　nervous　or　scared　or　judged　when　he　was　with　her。　It　was　nice。

“Really？”　Serena　asked；　grinning　as　if　it　was　the　most　amusing　thing　she’d　heard　all　day。　Nate　felt　a　surge　of　pride　to　realize　he　could　still　make　her　smile。　Did　that　mean　she　forgave　him？

Maybe　he　should　ask　his　cow　what　she　thinks。

“Yeah。　Her　name’s　Juliet；”　Nate　said。　He　didn’t　really　want　to　talk　about　cows　anymore；　but　if　he　wasn’t　talking　about　that；　he　didn’t　know　what　he’d　start　babbling　about。　Cows　seemed　like　a　pretty　safe　choice。　“She　has　really　long　eyelashes　and　likes　to　be　touched　behind　the　ears。”

Don’t　we　all？

“Should　I　be　worried？”　Serena　giggled。　She　couldn’t　believe　she’d　been　so　nervous　about　talking　to　Nate。

“Dude；　you　either　got　really　fucking　weird　or　you　have　some　fucking　amazing　weed　I　need　to　sample　immediately。”　Anthony　wiggled　his　eyebrows　crazily。

“Nah；”　Nate　replied　simply。

“I’m　getting　some　brews。”　Anthony　turned　on　his　heel；　trailed　by　Charlie　and　Jeremy。

Nate　shook　his　head　dreamily；　as　if　he　hadn’t　noticed　they’d　already　left。　“I　can’t　believe　you’re　here；”　he　said　to　Serena。　A　stray　eyelash　sat　on　her　cheekbone。　He　gently　brushed　it　away　with　hi