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第18部分（第1页）

ch。

¨But　weˇre　not　star…crossed　lovers！〃　I　say。

Haymitch　grabs　my　shoulders　and　pins　me　against　the　wall。　¨Who　cares？　Itˇs　all　a　big　show。　Itˇs　all　how　youˇre　perceived。　The　most　I　could　say　about　you　after　your　interview　was　that　you　were　nice　enough；　although　that　in　itself　was　a　small　miracle。　Now　I　can　say　youˇre　a　heartbreaker。　Oh；　oh；　oh；　how　the　boys　back　home　fall　longingly　at　your　feet。　Which　do　you　think　will　get　you　more　sponsors？〃

The　smell　of　wine　on　his　breath　makes　me　sick。　I　shove　his　hands　off　my　shoulders　and　step　away；　trying　to　clear　my　head。

Cinna　es　over　and　puts　his　arm　around　me。　¨Heˇs　right；　Katniss。〃

I　donˇt　know　what　to　think。　¨I　should　have　been　told；　so　I　didnˇt　look　so　stupid。〃

¨No；　your　reaction　was　perfect。　If　youˇd　known；　it　wouldnˇt　have　read　as　real；〃　says　Portia。

¨Sheˇs　just　worried　about　her　boyfriend；〃　says　Peeta　gruffly；　tossing　away　a　bloody　piece　of　the　urn。

My　cheeks　burn　again　at　the　thought　of　Gale。　¨I　donˇt　have　a　boyfriend。〃

¨Whatever；〃　says　Peeta。　¨But　I　bet　heˇs　smart　enough　to　know　a　bluff　when　he　sees　it。　Besides　you　didnˇt　say　you　loved　me。　So　what　does　it　matter？〃

The　words　are　sinking　in。　My　anger　fading。　Iˇm　torn　now　between　thinking　Iˇve　been　used　and　thinking　Iˇve　been　given　an　edge。　Haymitch　is　right。　I　survived　my　interview；　but　what　was　I　really？　A　silly　girl　spinning　in　a　sparkling；　dress。　Giggling。　The　only　moment　of　any　substance　I　hail　was　when　I　talked　about　Prim。　pare　that　with　Thresh；　his　silent；　deadly　power；　and　Iˇm　forgettable。　Silly　and　sparkly　and　forgettable。　No；　not　entirely　forgettable；　I　have　my　eleven　in　training。

But　now　Peeta　has　made　me　an　object　of　love。　Not　just　his。　To　hear　him　tell　it　I　have　many　admirers。　And　if　the　audience　really　thinks　weˇre　in　love　。　。　。　I　remember　how　strongly　they　responded　to　his　confession。　Star…crossed　lovers。　Haymitch　is　right；　they　eat　that　stuff　up　in　the　Capitol。　Suddenly　Iˇm　worried　that　I　didnˇt　react　properly。

¨After　he　said　he　loved　me；　did　you　think　I　could　be　in　love　with　him；　too？〃　I　ask。

¨I　did；〃　says　Portia。　¨The　way　you　avoided　looking　at　the　cameras；　the　blush。〃

They　others　chime　in；　agreeing。

¨Youˇre　golden；　sweetheart。　Youˇre　going　to　have　sponsors　lined　up　around　the　block；〃　says　Haymitch。

Iˇm　embarrassed　about　my　reaction。　I　force　myself　to　acknowledge　Peeta。　¨Iˇm　sorry　I　shoved　you。〃

¨Doesnˇt　matter；〃　he　shrugs。　¨Although　itˇs　technically　illegal。〃

¨Are　your　hands　okay？〃　I　ask。　¨Theyˇll　be　all　right；〃　he　says。

In　the　silence　that　follows；　delicious　smells　of　our　dinner　waft　in　from　the　dining　room。　¨e　on；　letˇs　eat；〃　says　Haymitch。　We　all　follow　him　to　the　table　and　take　our　places。　But　then　Peeta　is　bleeding　too　heavily；　and　Portia　leads　him　off　for　medical　treatment。　We　start　the　cream　and　rose…petal　soup　without　them。　By　the　time　weˇve　finished；　theyˇre　back。　Peetaˇs　hands　are　wrapped　in　bandages。　I　canˇt　help　feeling　guilty。　Tomorrow　we　will　be　in　the　arena。　He　has　done　me　a　favor　and　I　have　answered　with　an　injury。　Will　I　never　stop　owing　him？

After　dinner；　we　watch　the　replay　in　the　sitting　room。　I　seem　frilly　and　shallow；　twirling　and　giggling　in　my　dress；　although　the　others　assure　me　I　am　charming。　Peeta　actually　is　charming　and　then　utterly　winning　as　the　boy　in　love。　And　there　I　am；　blushing　and　confused；　made　beautiful　by　Cinnaˇs　hands；　desirable　by　Peetaˇs　confession；　tragic　by　circumstance；　and　by　all　accounts；　unforgettable。

When　the　anthem　finishes　and　the　screen　goes　dark；　a　hush　falls　on　the　room。　Tomorrow　at　dawn；　we　will　be　roused　and　prepared　for　the　arena。　The　actual　Games　donˇt　start　until　ten　because　so　many　of　the　Capitol　residents　rise　late。　But　Peeta　and　I　must　make　an　early　start。　There　is　no　telling　how　far　we　will　travel　to　the　arena　that　has　been　prepared　for　this　yearˇs　Games。

I　know　Haymitch　and　Effie　will　not　be　going　with　us。　As　soon　as　they　leave　here；　theyˇll　be　at　the　Games　Headquarters；　hopefully　madly　signing　up　our　sponsors；　working　out　a　strategy　on　how　and　when　to　deliver　the　gifts　to　us。　Cinna　and　Portia　will　travel　with　us　to　the　very　spot　from　which　we　will　be　launched　into　the　arena。　Still　final　good…byes　must　be　said　here。

Effie　takes　both　of　us　by　the　hand　and；　with　actual　tears　in　her　eyes；　wishes　us　well。　Thanks　us　for　being　the　best　tributes　it　has　ever　been　her　privilege　to　sponsor。　And　then；　because　itˇs　Effie　and　sheˇs　apparently　required　by　law　to　say　something　awful；　she　adds　¨I　wouldnˇt　be　at　all　surprised　if　I　finally　get　promoted　to　a　decent　district　next　year！〃

Then　she　kisses　us　each　on　the　cheek　and　hurries　out；　overe　with　either　the　emotional　parting　or　the　possible　improvement　of　her　fortunes。

Haymitch　crosses　his　arms　and　looks　us　both　over。

¨Any　final　words　of　advice？〃　asks　Peeta。

¨When　the　gong　sounds；　get　the　hell　out　of　there。　Youˇre　neither　of　you　up　to　the　blood　bath　at　the　Cornucopia。　Just　clear　out；　put　as　much　distance　as　you　can　between　yourselves　and　the　others；　and　find　a　source　of　water；〃　he　says。　¨Got　it？〃

¨And　after　that？〃　I　ask。

¨Stay　alive；〃　says　Haymitch。　Itˇs　the　same　advice　he　gave　us　on　the　train；　but　heˇs　not　drunk　and　laughing　this　time。　And　we　only　nod。　What　else　is　there　to　say？